Is it really worth finding out who we are and what our potential is at 40-50 years old?

Is it really worth finding out who we are and what our potential is at 40-50 years old?

Bad mouths say that it is „trendy” to do coaching. Others say it’s a waste of time or it’s expensive. Many believe that they do not fit in this approach and that they are „as good as they get”. On the other hand, young people, especially the so-called „young professionals”, choose to take coaching sessions because they do not want to advance in their life by learning only through „trial & error”. This is a personal perspective.

Then there is the organizational perspective of the companies. Serious studies, conducted all over the world, show what the companies that offer coaching sessions to the employees gain. For Romania, a recent study from Valoria revealed that the top managers here saw a 20% increase in the company’s profitability as a result of the benefits brought by the coaching programs. At the same time, the retention of the employees was 35% better, and the collaboration within the team improved by 70%.

We see in the public space all these organizational or personal perceptions, but also different beliefs and experiences related to coaching. By reading them, listening to them, discussing them, some of us ask ourselves: should I take or not take coaching sessions? The dilemma is legitimate not only for those who are overwhelmed by the contradictory opinions floating around but also for those who want to act with clarity.

1. Who am I in my life?

In the first part of life, from 0 to 6 years, everything that gets input on the „hard disk” of our biopsychosocial structure is „taken over” from the outside. We not only learn the language spoken by our parents but also their thinking patterns. We take whole sets of behaviors, values, and beliefs, without being able to consciously choose what we want to get input on our „hard disk”. In this way, the previous generations make sure that they convey their strategies of success, but the result is that none of us get out of this biopsychosocial process who we want to be.

In a world of slow change, where survival was the most important succes for million of years, these mechanisms were beneficial. In the world of industrial revolution 4.0, where rapid change is the only constant, the success strategies of previous generations need constant and conscious upgrades. To navigate in uncertain circumstances, we need conscious decision-making mechanisms and clarity. Therefore, we need self-awareness.

In coaching, this is the first step. Coaching brings effective tools for discovering the universe of our inner world, making conscious interaction with our values, desires, and aspirations possible. Thus, we consciously observe who we are in our lives and what we have „taken over” without being able to choose in our biopsychosocial structure.

2. How long do I have to find out who I am?

We can live our life „consciously” or „on autopilot”. Both variants are accessible to all and each has important benefits. Only the dosage differs from human to human. A life lived mainly „on autopilot” has many things ready-made and fewer moments of introspection. We strive to fulfill the social norm – school, high school, college, service, family, pension – without asking too many questions about the meaning of life. It is good to live so, but not only so.

Living consciously gives you the discomfort of doubt and the need for insight, but it makes you a creator. Once you understand yourself, who you are and who you want to become, what your values, desires, and aspirations are, what strengths make you unique and different, you activate your inner power. Internal resources such as self-confidence, self-esteem, courage, determination become very accessible.

The transformation from „autopilot” to „conscious” is facilitated by coaching and it brings immediate and significant benefits to all those who decide to spend their time. Only when we realize that our most important resource is time, we act to understand who we are, what fits us, and how we can consciously live a meaningful life that will bring us fulfillment.

3. What do optimized success strategies mean?

Everything we do in a particular environment or context has a corresponding decision-making mechanism in our inner reality, whether it is conscious or not. We learn from those around us how to interact with others and copy behaviors that ensure our success in the social, professional, personal life. Depending on one’s own set of fundamental values, success can mean power, wealth, status, influence or contribution, involvement, compassion, integration.

The way we manage to use the mix of internal resources that gives us the best strategy for success for each situation is something one can train. It’s part learning and part paracticing. For both parts, it is much better to learn with a coach than to learn alone. The benefit of coaching in optimizing one’s strategies for succes is rapid access one’s potential. This is the main reason why companies allocate budgets for coaching programs. The result is a win-win one for the employee, who understands and accesses their potential, and for the company, which achieves greater efficiency and productivity.

In conclusion

Yes, there is a lot of talk about coaching. In companies, managers are required to participate in individual or team coaching programs. Often, such an approach is perceived by them as a corrective action, because apparently they do not perform to the desired level of top management. Many other people think about whether or not to take coaching session. This is not the question.

If you are libed by you life and you are not the creator of your life, if you do not know yourself so well that you get empowered by your self-esteem, self-confidence, courage, and clarity, ask yourself how long of your life you want to spend to discover all these alone. Is it worth finding out who we are and what our potential is at 40-50 years old? Isn’t it better to solve this part by working with a coach when we are 20 years old, then to explore our potential, enjoying our lives?